


Unwinding

by UselessLilium (o0whitelily0o)



Series: Kazumi Onimaru Appreciation Project [12]
Category: Cardfight!! Vanguard
Genre: BDSM, Breathplay, Consensual Kink, Fluff, Interspecies Relationship(s), Kink Negotiation, M/M, Past Abuse, Tail Constriction/Bondage, nonsexual kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-02 07:15:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16782214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/o0whitelily0o/pseuds/UselessLilium
Summary: Kazumi and Shiranui continue figuring out what, exactly, their comfort levels are with their renewed relationship - which means figuring out what kind of intimacy they're ready for as well.





	Unwinding

**Author's Note:**

> This fic basically acts as a sequel to 'Interdependence', where Kazumi and Shiranui had a(n unhealthy) D/s relationship the year prior to the Diffride. It's not totally necessary to read that one first, but if you're curious about the details, this is where to go: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13092429

When Shiranui agreed to continue his relationship with Kazumi, it was with the full understanding that there would be serious changes. No treating Kazumi’s problems lightly or speaking down to him. Doing more to explain his own feelings without casting blame. He’d be gentler - more careful - with him.

And, of course, there would be none of the same kind of intimacy they had engaged in before the Diffride.

He’d like to tell himself that he hadn’t been thinking, when he chose to enforce that image of chains and binding on Kazumi during the Diffride. That he’d simply been angry, or that it was only practicality. An extra precaution to ensure Kazumi couldn’t break free of his control. But to ignore his own cruelty was to avoid taking responsibility for it. After all, in the first place, Kazumi hadn’t even tried to break free. The image was unnecessary, and chosen deliberately. Taking something he knew was important to Kazumi and mocking it as viciously as he knew how, just as he’d done with the members of Try3 and Kazumi’s brother.

No, he had no right that much control over Kazumi again. Surely it would be terrifying for him, to re-enact such a scene now. The simple fact that Kazumi trusted him at all was more than he could have asked for. So he would adjust - there were other ways to show affection, and whatever Kazumi was comfortable with would be enough.

That’s what he thought, at least. But as more time passed, there were a few issues that arose, which drove Shiranui to reconsider his stance.

For one, although Kazumi was working hard to speak his own feelings more clearly, he remained hesitant to do or say anything that might be seen as ‘selfish’. When he did, it was usually caked in apologies and anxious tics Shiranui had long grown used to picking up. 

For another, Kazumi had offered and agreed to another Diffride. There were very few, if any, ways to give Shiranui more control, but... Kazumi hadn’t been scared. He’d been nervous, yes, and once or twice grown quite tense. But while Shiranui had been paying close attention to him, ready to call it off the second he started to panic, for the most part Kazumi had just been excited. Happy. Eager to share this with him. It was touching... so much so, that Shiranui wasn’t sure how to put it into words.

And also... well. Once you knew what to look for, Kazumi was quite an open book. His small sighs when Shiranui gripped him a bit more tightly than normal, or how his eyes kept going back to Shiranui’s teeth when they talked, or the way his hand would linger sometimes on the edge of Shiranui’s claws... Shiranui wouldn’t leap to any conclusions, but it seemed clear Kazumi still had his own interest.

Just to test his theory, Shiranui let a claw graze the side of Kazumi’s neck. Immediately, Kazumi’s face pinkened and he turned his head slightly to bare his neck more. That settled it - this was something they should actually talk about, to ensure there were no misunderstandings.

“Kazumi,” Shiranui said, loosening his grip on Kazumi so as not to intimidate, “Is there something you’d like to ask of me?”

Kazumi flinched a little, clearly embarrassed at having been found out, and the pink on his cheeks deepened into red. “I’m sorry,” he said, “I didn’t... I didn’t mean to be so obvious.”

“There is, then.” As he thought. Gently, Shiranui rubbed his thumb against Kazumi’s back. “It’s alright, you can tell me. If there’s something you want-”

But Kazumi just shook his head firmly. “No, really, it’s fine.” He smiled a little, but his face was still red and he couldn’t quite meet Shiranui’s eyes. “Even if you don’t mind, there’s no point if I’m the only one who likes it.”

“...Pardon?”

He leaned in against Shiranui’s chest, seeming not to notice the dragon’s confusion. “You’ve been doing plenty for me already. I won’t ask you to indulge me like that again, especially not on top of everything else. I promise.”

Ah... Shiranui let out a long, low groan. That  _ had  _ been his choice of words, hadn’t it? Not for the first time, he wished he could throttle his careless past self. “Kazumi,” he finally said, “Do you really think I would have agreed to do all that if I didn’t enjoy it?”

Kazumi blinked up at him, his brow furrowing lightly. “I mean... you never said you did. It was always just for me. A reward.” He laced his fingers together, gripping himself nervously as he glanced away. “And during the Diffride... I thought that meant you were angry about it.”

Shiranui’s tail flicked. It wasn’t entirely untrue, but- “No, what anger I felt had to do with my own mistaken belief I’d been betrayed. I didn’t resent you for any of your requests,” Kazumi looked up at him, not seeming especially convinced. Shiranui sighed, running a careful claw through the ends of Kazumi’s hair. “Though I’ll admit, at the beginning I was mainly curious. I’d heard of such things, but I hadn’t... had many opportunities to experiment like that myself.” He paused, then decided to admit, “Or any opportunities, really. It was a first for me.”

Kazumi stared, honestly shocked. “Really? You seemed so confident...”

“Well, I was trying to impress you.” He pulled his lips back into a very toothy grin. “Did I succeed?” That made Kazumi laugh a bit, and he nodded with a sheepish smile. Seeing that, Shiranui was able to relax some. “At any rate, even that first time, I was fascinated. You were so willing to put yourself in my hands, and it felt...honest.” His tail flicked back and forth. He really wasn’t used to talking about this kind of thing. “Perhaps that isn’t the right word. But... I could tell how hard you tried to be polite with me when we met. So getting you to let go of your self-restraint - being trusted with your vulnerability - it did seem special. I wanted to see more.” He let out a soft sigh. “I should have told you that sooner, but I thought it wouldn’t be appropriate for the role. My apologies, you must have been worrying about this for some time.”

“N-no, that’s alright,” Kazumi said, voice soft and wavering a little. Privately, Shiranui felt pleased to see the blush on his face had only deepened. Trying to still look composed, Kazumi cleared his throat and put a hand to his cheek. “I’m... I’m glad, then. That it wasn’t a bother. But - um - offering so suddenly-”

A little amused, Shiranui snorted lightly. “Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not saying we need to do anything right now or put you on the spot. Simply that, if you’d like to try again, I’ll welcome it.” 

Kazumi relaxed a little, and nodded. “Alright. I’ll think about it.” He looked up, smiling more easily. “To be honest, I would like to just say yes right now. But...”

“Of course.” Shiranui leaned down, nuzzling Kazumi’s face gently. “Think about it carefully. It’s not worth the risk of hurting you, if you’re that unsure.” Kazumi made a small noise of agreement, and leaned against Shiranui’s maw, stroking affectionately just below his teeth.

* * *

It was a few night later that Shiranui found himself with Kazumi again. The human seemed restless, pacing instead of sitting down next to him or in his lap like usual. Shiranui was about to prompt him, when Kazumi finally stilled and took a breath. “Alright, I do... think I’d like to try again. If you still want to.”

Letting out a slightly amused snort, Shiranui said, “Don’t worry, I wouldn’t change my mind that quickly.” He leaned down closer. “Then, did you have something specific you want to do?”

“Well, at first I thought... maybe ropes, but...” He glanced down, rubbing his forearm. “That might- might be a little too similar. I mean, for now, at least.”

“You don’t need to qualify it like that,” Shiranui said, firmly, “I don’t want you to feel like you have to be alright with something again, just because we did it before.”

Kazumi nodded, like he couldn’t quite make himself agree verbally. Then he said, sounding more sure, “In any case, I thought that if the problem was being too similar, maybe we should try something we hadn’t before.”

Shiranui felt his wings rustle with interest. “What did you have in mind?”

“...Your tail. You could, um, wrap me in it. That way I could- I could feel you the whole time. I wouldn’t have to worry about... being left.” The more he spoke, the more his voice wavered, and a nervous edge creeped further into his smile. It made Shiranui ache to see. He reached down, offering his hand for Kazumi to hold onto. That seemed to help, as he grabbed onto Shiranui’s index finger and stood a little straighter when he said, “If you don’t mind, of course.”

Well, it was certainly a new idea. He turned back to look at his tail, considering the logistics. It was definitely long enough for what Kazumi was requesting. The main problem would be the width, but it tapered enough towards the tip that it ought to coil tightly enough. He tended to use it more for the blade than constricting his opponents, but that required control and dexterity too. He thought he had good enough control over its movements that he wouldn’t endanger Kazumi accidentally. 

And when he did actually picture Kazumi wound up in it... he was glad his own expressions didn’t show as easily as a human’s. Finally, he said, “The ridges will likely hurt a bit.”

“That’s fine,” Kazumi said immediately, only to blush just as quickly. Shiranui snorted lightly in amusement, and gave Kazumi’s had a small squeeze.

“Alright. Then I’ll be happy to try.” He straightened back up, and said gravely, “But if you feel like you’re starting to panic, just-”

“Tap you three times, like usual.” Kazumi nodded, just as serious. “I will, I promise."

Shiranui nodded. “Then,” he said, letting go of Kazumi’s hand, “Would you like us to begin?” Kazumi closed his eyes and took a deep breath, and opened them again with a firm nod. Shiranui grinned, showing as many teeth as he could, and let a commanding tone into his voice. “Come closer then, Kazumi.”

His partner straightened, and did as requested as Shiranui snaked his tail around, considering the best way to start this. Legs first, that seemed best. Kazumi watched as the bladed tip circled him - not yet touching him, but leading the rest of the tail up, once around his ankles, then just below his knees, then up to his thighs. Still not quite touching, but undeniably surrounding him. Kazumi looked transfixed, his breath picking up at he felt the pressure of the threat.

Then, when his tail reached up behind Kazumi’s back, he tightened the coil, forcing Kazumi’s legs together and pulling him up off his feet. Only the flat of the blade supporting his back kept Kazumi from simply falling to the ground. He squeaked at the sudden movement, looking and sounding very like a mouse, eyes widening with the pretty shine Shiranui had always liked seeing. Shiranui lifted him further into the air, leaning him back so he was almost laying on the blade. It was large enough that Kazumi would really have to  _ try _ to cut himself on the edge in this position, but it was clear on his face and from the tension in his body that just being that close to it was enough to unsteady him. “So,” Shiranui said, trying to make the teasing obviously, “If it what you were hoping for?”

Kazumi laughed, sounding breathless already. “I- yes. Thank you.” He trailed a hand along the coil around his thighs. “...It really is reassuring, being able to feel you this clearly.”

“It was a good idea.” His Vanguard kept his eyes down towards his tail, but even from that angle it was easy to see the shy smile and pink on his cheeks. “You are quite cute like this, Kazumi.” Kazumi laughed again, and the ease with which he did so was encouraging. Shiranui lifted his chin with a claw, and asked with a grin. “Would you like me to trap your arms too?

But though Kazumi’s eyes lit up briefly, after a few moments he shook his head. “No, not this time. I don’t want to risk it. But...” Still shy, but looking a little hopeful at the idea, “Could you still wrap higher up?”

Well, how could he say no? “Of course.” He drew his hand back, and once again used nothing but his tail. It was an interesting sensation, coiling further while already being wrapped tight around him. Feeling the shape of Kazumi’s body in his own so clearly, down to every breath and heartbeat. Sure enough, the ridges seemed to make it uncomfortable for Kazumi. He squirmed, in what limited way he could, and made small whining sounds that he couldn’t seem to help. But though Shiranui kept a careful watch on his hands for the signal to stop, or any indication Kazumi was too panicked to move, there didn’t seem to be any reason for alarm.

As requested, Shiranui left his arms free, instead letting his tail curl around Kazumi’s waist and chest. The idea of looping around his neck too was sorely tempting, but Shiranui didn’t quite trust himself to have fine enough control to simply apply pressure without damaging anything. That there could be no permanent damage in this space they were in was besides the point. It wasn’t something he wanted to toy with lightly. He settled for cupping the back of Kazumi’s neck with it, the bladed end just in Kazumi’s line of sight. He felt Kazumi swallow when he saw it. 

For a moment, he just took in the feeling of Kazumi’s body - his warmth, the way the tension in his muscles shifted as he tried to hold himself up even in Shiranui’s grip, and how each breath pressed against the coils - and then had an idea. “Kazumi,” he said, leaning further over him, “I’m going to squeeze for a bit.”

Kazumi’s eyes widened with excitement, and Shiranui took that for an answer. He tightened the coils, feeling the ridges of each segment pushing into Kazumi’s skin through his clothes, and the constriction forcing Kazumi into shallower breaths. He watched carefully, but Kazumi just coughed and took short gasping breaths, and held onto the part of tail around his waist. Not tapping or pushing at it, just holding. A sweet gesture. And true to his word, after no more than half a minute, Shiranui eased his grip and let Kazumi breathe more easily. 

But when he did, Kazumi just looked up at him, eyes shining, and asked, “Could you- could you do it tighter?”

_ So much for wanting to be careful _ , Shiranui thought, stifling another snort and instead cautioning, “You might not be able to breathe at all if I do that.”

“...Please? Just for a little while, the way you just did.”

As long as he understood, Shiranui wasn’t about to deny him. This time Shiranui forced the air out of Kazumi’s lungs and kept the hold too tight for anything to come back in. He watched Kazumi’s throat as he struggled with the lack of oxygen, half-expecting a signal to stop, and still received nothing of the sort.

“It honestly is a marvel,” he said without entirely meaning to, as he loosened his grip again and let Kazumi gasp for air. “That you still want me to do anything like this to you.” Kazumi looked up at him with confusion, but was still too out of breath to speak. Just as he seemed about to try, Shiranui tightened the coils again. “I don’t know that I ever really thanked you, when you told me you wanted to try again. I suppose I didn’t think I had a right to.”

He held his grip a few seconds longer, and when he eased up this time, Kazumi was wheezing more than anything and not trying to move. Shiranui drew him closer, so they were nearly at eye level.

“I am very fortunate, Kazumi, that you - of all the people on your planet - reached me,” he said, nuzzling Kazumi’s cheek and giving it a small lick. The gesture felt a bit silly to him, but it was the closest he could get to a kiss. And it did make Kazumi smile. “I hope you know I don’t take that for granted.” 

There was the start of tears in Kazumi’s eyes now, and he reached up to put his hands on either side of Shiranui’s face. But he still couldn’t quite manage to say more than a shaky, “Sh-Shira...nui...”

Shiranui tightened his hold again. More slowly this time, letting himself savor the feeling. Letting Kazumi do the same, watching as his attempts at catching his breath grew shallower, as he realized that soon there wouldn’t be any chance at all. Feeling him accept his helplessness, turning limp and pliant even as lost the ability to draw breath. And still trying to keep his arms up, his hands on Shiranui’s face. That gesture, that attempt to hold on as long as possible, made Shiranui’s chest ache as much as it warmed it. 

There were so many things he wished he understood about Kazumi sooner. That he wished he appreciated sooner. Even when Kazumi’s trust and devotion was staring him in the face, he couldn’t recognize it for what it was back then. And now that he could, it was nearly overwhelming to face. But at least now, he had an answer for it.

“I do love you, Kazumi,” he said, softly. Kazumi made no response, though of course, he couldn’t. Finally, just as slowly, Shiranui eased his grip. Watched the color come back into Kazumi’s face, as he remained ragdoll limp. 

“Sh-” Kazumi tried to say as soon as he could, only to break off into weak coughing. Maybe that last time had been a bit too much, Shiranui thought with a touch of fear. He put his hand underneath Kazumi’s back, both for extra support and a more solid reassurance.

“It’s alright,” Shiranui said, “Take your time and try to breathe. I’m not going anywhere..”

Kazumi gave him a look he couldn’t quite read, but nodded. Steadily, his breathing evened out, and he gave Shiranui’s thumb a weak one-armed hug. Then, when he seemed to have a grip on himself, he said with a slight wheeze, “That’s not fair... saying that when I can’t answer.”

Shiranui snorted lightly. “Well, you’ve already said it. Some time ago, even.”

“Still... that’s no- no reason-” he trailed off into more coughing, but nuzzled Shiranui’s thumb. When he calmed down some more, his Vanguard looked up at him. “Do you... do you really mean it?”

“I do.” Shiranui gave Kazumi’s cheek another small lick. “Or do you trust me with your well-being, but not to be honest about my own feelings?”

To his credit, Kazumi gave a rueful smile. “I... suppose that... would be silly, wouldn’t it?” He relaxed again, letting Shiranui hold him up completely, and said, “Thank you... so much. I love you too.”

Shiranui knew that. Whether he personally found it misguided or not, Kazumi was an open book about that matter. Shiranui unwound his tail, letting Kazumi half-collapse into his hand. He drew Kazumi against his shoulder, curling his neck down around him protectively and feeling Kazumi nestle against it with a contented sigh. Whether he felt he deserved this much of Kazumi’s trust or not was besides the point. He had it. And he would make sure it wasn’t wasted.


End file.
